


Anthony DiNozzo one shots

by Kaunis_Sielu



Category: NCIS
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-15
Updated: 2017-12-14
Packaged: 2019-02-15 00:37:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13019571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaunis_Sielu/pseuds/Kaunis_Sielu





	1. Chapter 1

A collection of DiNozzo oneshots


	2. Migraine

Your head was pounding. You had one hell of a migraine but you were needed here. You were the only one who could decipher this stupid code within a reasonable time frame. You’ve got earplugs in to help drown out the noise, one of the NCIS baseball hats and your sunglasses are still on to help block out the lights. You take a sip of water, staying hydrated is important, then turn your face back to the page on your desk in front of you. Your computer is off, keeping away that annoying blue light. Tony swipes your hat off your head jolting it painfully and you swear.   
“Tony! Damn it! Give that back!”  
“Why so glum? A little hungover are we?”   
“No, I have a migraine.” You say through gritted teeth. Why is he so annoying sometimes? You huff softly to yourself, sometimes? Try all the time. “Give me my hat back.”  
“Is that what we’re calling them these days? A migraine.”  
“Gibbs.” You complain as he comes into the space and yanks your hat off of Tony’s head then tosses it to you in one fluid motion. He knows how bad your migraines can get if you’re not careful. He’s seen what happens, Tony on the other hand has not.   
You can hear him chattering away, even through the ear plugs, all morning. Does he ever shut up? It’s when he starts a bad imitation of Cyndi Lauper that you finally snap.   
“Tony! Shut the hell up! I can hear you through my earplugs like you’re standing right next to me! Do you think you could go one day, just one fucking day, without pissing me off?”  
“Damn. Sorry princess!” He snaps back at you.   
“Oh for god sake!” You sneer, “Did I hurt your fragile ego Tony?”  
“My ego is not fragile!” You roll your eyes and notice that McGee is watching the two of you in fascination. Gibbs is nowhere to be found.   
“Then quit being a baby and shut up. Please! My head is pounding, the letters on this fucking page keep moving around, and I feel like I’m gong to throw up. I just want to get this finished and go home!”   
“Wow. I didn’t know you were so crabby when you were hungover.” He says standing and starting away. You stand and move away from your desk, stalking after him.   
“I. Am. Not. Hungover.” You snap and when he stops suddenly and turns on you you come to a quick halt behind him. Standing there hits you suddenly. You didn’t take care of the migraine like you should have. Too much light, or noise, or not enough water. Tony opens his mouth to retort when his eyes go wide in surprise. The last thing you’re aware of is Gibbs yelling your name as he charges toward you.   
You’re propped up against something warm. The pounding in your head is worse than before but it usually is when you pass out.   
“Are you done ranting now?” The warm thing asks softly, sounding very concerned.   
“I’m sorry I yelled at you.” You mumble softly.   
“It’s fine. I didn’t realize how bad they got.” Tony admits gently.   
“How long was I out?” You mutter.   
“Long enough.” Gibbs says grimly, “You’re going home and Tony is taking you.”  
“No Gibbs! I’m fine. I need to finish.” He looks down at you in amusement.   
“You’re going home.” He repeats and you sigh.   
“Fine.” He helps you to your feet and you gather your things from your desk, including the file.   
“Leave it.” Gibbs growls.   
“Gibbs.” You huff only succeeding in making him laugh softly. You follow Tony to the elevator mumbling about how annoyed you are and how all you want to do is your damn job and is that too much to ask? You stop when the elevator opens again.   
“Are you done?“ Tony asks quietly a small smile on his face. You purse your lips at him but nod. “Good.” He pulls you gently to him, “You scared me today.” He admits softly. “One minute you were arguing and the next you were headed to the floor. Why did you tell me they get that bad?”  
“Would you have believed me?”  
“I don’t know. I am glad you’re going home though. I have orders to stay with you.”  
“Tony I’ll be fine. I’m going to go to bed.”  
“Gibbs orders. He’s the boss kid.” He say giving you a gentle squeeze then letting you go. Well, at least he’d watch good movies with you.


	3. Pizza

Mmm. Pizza. You’re famished and you can smell it before you see it sitting on McGee’s desk. You grab two pieces and bring them to your desk. One you eat while typing and the other sits on a napkin on your desk. Tony and Tim come in bickering about, well, who knows what and you ignore them while reading what you’ve come up with on your screen. You reach blindly for the second slice only for it to slip from your grasp. You glance up and see a grinning Tony taking a large bite out of your piece of pizza.   
“Hey! I was going to eat that!” You cry crossing your arms over your chest and scowling at him.   
“Too slow.” He says with a mouthful of your pizza and a grin on his face. You huff and go to grab a second piece when Tim picks up the box and the remaining two pieces slide off and directly onto the floor. Cheese down.   
“Awe! McGee.” You whine softly.   
“I’m so sorry!” He cries and he looks it.   
“It’s okay, can you order another one? This is the first time I’ve eaten since yesterday.”  
“No problem.” He says as he types on his computer.   
“You’re my hero.” You tease kissing him on the cheek.   
“McGee what do you have for me?”  
“I’m looking for the last known for our suspect Gary Miller.”  
“Good. You two are going to go follow the wife. She’s up to something and I want to know what.”  
“On it.” Tony says and you grab your badge, gun and jacket.   
“McGee scratch the pizza.” You call on your way to the elevator.   
“Don’t get caught.” Gibbs instructs. You nod and follow Tony onto the elevator. The doors slide shut and he leans in toward you.   
“Aren’t you excited you get to spend a whole evening with me?” He grins.   
“I don’t know if excited is the right word.” You deadpan. You do like Tony, he’s sweet, brave, smart and charming when he wants to be but he’s mostly a bit of a pain in the ass. Like that’s the base level of his personality, he wants to know how to push your buttons.   
“Awe. Are you still mad about the pizza?”  
“That was my first food since yesterday. Morning. Tony. So we are stopping for food and you are buying.” You inform his as the doors slide open. He follows you to his car and, with no argument takes you to one of the better fast food places in the area and pays without complaint. McGee has pinged the wife’s phone and had sent you her location. Tony pulls up outside the restaurant she’s in. You can see her through the window, talking and laughing with someone just beyond your view.   
“She doesn’t seem much like a new widow does she?” Tony asks glancing at you.   
“No, not really. Can you make sure the lights won’t turn on. I need to get this out of here. It stinks.” You say holding up the bag that had contained your food.   
“Sure.” He clicks the lights so they won’t turn on when you get out of the car. Taking your phone with you throw the trash away before attempting to get a photo of the man your mark is with. You get one but he’s far and it’s blurry and just as you’re on your way back to the car they stand up. You move with purpose but not too quickly and manage to slide into the passengers side before they exit the building.   
“They’re coming out!” You hiss to Tony.   
“Duck.” He says before trying to dip down. He bumps the horn and you grab his face.   
“Kiss me quick!”  
“Wha-” You cut him off with a kiss. His lips are much softer than you’d expected them to be. There’s a tap on the window and you break away to see the irritated face of Nina Miller in the window.   
“Are you two following me?” She demands when a flustered Tony rolls down the window.   
“No.” You lie easily. “We’re not allowed to date team members.”   
“Rule number 12.” Tony says ruefully.   
“So your boss doesn’t know.”  
“As far as we can tell he doesn’t but Gibbs seems to know everything.” You say just before your phone chirps.   
“Hmm. I see you two around again, or any of your team for that matter, I may just let it slip that rule 12 is being broken.” You look at Tony wide eyed before you answer your phone.   
“Yea Gibbs?” It’s Abby.   
“It’s Abby.”  
“I know. Right away Gibbs.”  
“Did you get busted?”  
“Yes. We’ll be right there. Okay bye.” You make it look like you’ve hung up your phone then set it in your lap.   
“Gibbs wants us to run down a lead.”  
“I’m glad you’re done making out and are getting back to work.” She snips before moving away her heels clicking loudly.   
“Lets head back.” You tell Tony as you go back to the conversation.   
“You made out with Tony?” Abby shrieks into your ear.   
“Only to make sure we didn’t get busted.”  
“Mhmm. But Gibbs really does want you back.”   
“On our way.”


	4. Always

You hated undercover work. Hated it. What you hated even more than undercover work was undercover work with Tony in a tiny ass town. Tony was protective on a good day but when you were playing a target he was, apparently, a giant pain in the ass.   
You’ve been dancing on the barn floor for what feels like forever. The small town is bustling with travelers, bikers from Sturgis. Hikers that are going up into the Black Hills. Tourists who just want to see the presidents in the hill. And a serial killer. So now you and Tony are here, he’s watching you, you’re watching for the serial killer.   
“Care if I join you?” A silky voice says and you smile up at him.   
“Not in the slightest.” His hands go to your hips, yours to his shoulders. He spins you around the dance floor and you can’t help the laugh that tumbles from your lips. When the song is over he doesn’t let go, keeping a gentle but firm grip on you.   
“So, what brings you all the way out here?”  
“I’m a wildlife photographer when my husband is overseas. It keeps me busy and occupied. Makes his deployment seem so much shorter.”  
“Military man?”  
“He is.”  
“Is he going to be mad that his woman was dancing with another man?”  
“Nah, he trusts me. Besides, it’s just dancing.”  
“Very true.” He smiles down at you. You’re about to ask his name when someone clears their throat.   
“Mind if I cut in?” You’d recognize that voice anywhere.   
“Oh uh, I mean we were kind of having a conversation.” The man whose name you still haven’t gotten says.   
“Come on man.” Tony charms with a broad smile. Your partner concedes and you move on to dance with Tony with a smile.   
“Seriously?” You hiss through your teeth, a fake smile plastered on your face.   
“What? I wanted to dance with you.”  
“Tony.” You squint your eyes at him and he chuckles.   
“What?” He tries to lie to you again and you just glare up at him. “Okay fine. He fit the profile that the FBI gave us. I didn’t want him touching you.”   
“You don’t need to protect me!” You hiss and he shrugs.   
“I think I do, you’re my partner.” The song ends and you move away from him.   
“Song’s over. We need to go find that guy.”  
“Just text McGee his name.” Tony says keeping step with you as you make your way off of the dance floor. You turn on him, furious and jab a finger into his chest.   
“I didn’t get his name because someone cut in.” You turn and stalk away from him, “I’m going back to the hotel. Don’t follow me.” You snap over your shoulder and to your relief he doesn’t. You head out of the bar and down the street toward the small hotel room that the two of you are sharing. It’s not ideal but it was all you could get with the bikers in town. You woke before him this morning, tangled in him. It had been tricky work getting out of his grasp without waking him. Not that you’d minded, if you were honest with yourself, Tony had managed to work his way under your armor and had completely charmed you. That might be why you were so irritated with him, he’d made it clear that Gibbs had a rule about co-workers dating. And that it was a huge no-no.   
You’re so caught up in your thoughts that you almost don’t hear him. His even steps behind you.   
“Damn it Tony I thought I told you not to follow me.” You say as you turn to face him. Except he’s not there. No one is. “Shit.” You whisper before continuing toward the hotel. You pull your phone from your pocket and dial Tony’s number. He answers on the second ring.   
“Yea?”  
“Are you following me?” You ask in a hushed tone.   
“No. I just left the bar.” Your heart sinks, “Is someone following you?”  
“Yes.”  
“On my way.” You can tell he’s running.   
“I’m on third.”   
“Keep moving. Stay on the line.”  
“Yea.” You keep moving the feet keep pace with you and you’re getting more and more anxious. Not that you can’t take them, it’s just that he’s already killed three women you really don’t need to be the fourth.   
A hand wraps around your forearm and you twist out of their grasp. You turn to face them and are disappointed to find that it’s not Tony. In fact you don’t recognize him at all.   
“I saw you flirting with some other men.” He sneers. “I heard you telling them you were married. How would your husband like that?”  
“I was just dancing with them.” You say taking a step back away from him.   
“Getting felt up by other men while he’s off serving his country. You slut.” He sneers and your back bumps the brick wall behind you. He closes the gap between you and wraps his hand around your throat so fast that you don’t have time to react. Your feet scrape the ground where they barely touch, you claw at his arm trying to get him to loosen his grip to no avail. You’re starting to loose consciousness, the darkness is creeping into your peripheral vision. There’s a loud crack then you go tumbling to the ground as the hand around your throat suddenly vanishes.   
“Are you okay?” Tony’s face comes into view. “Are you okay?” He repeats when you don’t answer. You nod, your throat hurting too much to actually from the words. A corner comes and takes the body, local police interview you and Tony. Then you’re let go, neither of you talk on the way back to the hotel.   
“Tony.” You say softly just before you get to your room.   
“Yea?”  
“Thank you.”  
“Any time. I’m just glad you’re okay.”  
“I guess I do need you to protect me a little.” You say before wrapping your arms around his torso in a tight hug. One that he returns.   
“I’ll always be there for you.” He promises, “Always.”


	5. Passing Notes

_In your fucking dreams DiNozzo._

You scribble onto the post-it note and stick it to his monitor. He’d left you one that said fuck you on it and you didn’t want him getting any ideas. You leave with Tim then, to go question yet another suspect. As the elevator doors shut you glance over at Tim to see him looking at you with raised brows.

“Can I help you Timmy?” You ask sweetly.

“Uh, why are you and Tony leaving each other notes?”

“Because I’m mad at him so I’m not talking to him but I’ll leave him a note.”

“Um. Okay.” He doesn’t ask any more questions and when you get back you see another post-it note on your computer.

 _I hate that shirt. It would look better on my floor._ You scowl at the paper to keep the smile off of your face.

 _Your suit is ugly, I’d like to take it off you._ You stick it to his computer screen then head down to see Abby.

The next time you’re at your desk Tony is at his. There’s no note on your computer screen but he glares at you and you return the favor. McGee is missing and you glance over at his desk.

“Interrogation with Boss.” Tony answers your unasked question. You turn on your heel and head there too, Tony close on your heels. He sticks a note into your hand before passing you by. You duck into the bathroom and unfold it.

 _I hate you_. You chuckle softly then scribble your own note on the back.

You slip it into his pocket once you get to the observation room. Gibbs is already in the room glaring down the suspect. Gibbs cracks the suspect, like you knew he would, then lets the team head home. You get home, drop your purse on the floor and grab the bottle of wine from your fridge.

Pouring two glasses you sip from one and leave the other on the counter. He doesn’t bother knocking. Just lets himself in with the key you made him. He bypasses the wine you’d poured him and instead catches your face in his hands, pressing his mouth firmly to yours.

“I have been wanting to do that all day.” He whispers resting his forehead on yours.

“Me too.” You admit and he grins at you before kissing you again. “We’re not going to be able to keep this up.”

“I know. Let’s not talk about it tonight. We have a whole weekend to ourselves.”

“Okay fine. But we do need to talk about this Tony.”

“Mmhm.” He agrees before kissing you again.


End file.
